OK, he's on his honeymoon, but he got back to me. He used a product from a company called Prosoco. He thinks we used their OH100 product. He also mentioned their H100 product, which has a water repellent. I was close about "binding." My guy corrected me, the keyword is "densifier" or "consolidator." He did confirm that sealers are good for sandstone materials (like flagstone), but also that sealers, for the most part, do not have the qualities to densify or consolidate. The term "sealer" is kind of a catch all, so there could be one that also has the ingredients required for those qualities. Point was, if you just go buy some stone sealer somewhere, it won't likely do the trick.
He didn't think you could buy this stuff off the shelf, but rather would have to order it special from somewhere. He suggested you contact Prosoco about your stone issues and let them recommend the best product. Apparently, they have quite a selection to choose from. They should be able to also tell you how to get a hold of their product.
He highly recommended that whatever you try, you use his MO, which is to try it out in a sample-sort-of-way. Not to blast all of your coping and hope for the best. Make sure whatever you use will do the trick on a small area first. If it goes haywire and reacts badly to the stone, at least you'll minimize the hit. That goes for anything you work with, on any type of hardscape.
I remember the overspray was a minor problem. It got into the water and created a bit of a jelly like "oil spill." Fortunately, it floats. We scooped up what we could, the skimmer/filter took care of the rest. It washed out of my cartridges. But you do have to be careful about the application.
Please do share what you come up with. Your issue is not unique at all and many others here will benefit from what you learn.