Still Stingy With My Pool

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Mendy48

Mendy48

Bronze Supporter
Apr 27, 2018
1,006
Midland, MI
I posted a thread almost a year ago about how "stingy" I was with my pool (click here). I thought I'll take everyone's advise and consider opening my pool to a religious leader and his family (or whoever), but I have yet to do that.

I recently told someone (yesterday) that this person from the church was not invited to my home for any pool party. I feel like "Crud" for saying that but I didn't want to open a can of worms if I said "yes, invite them". I'm afraid that this invite would give more reason for more people to come over. ?‍♀️

I actually said some nasty words when a relative of mine insisted I invite this person to my home.

Ugh... I should enjoy the pool with people, but I don't know why I'm so stringy when it comes to my Oasis. The older I get, the less I want to hang out with PEOPLE (which is odd).?‍♀️

When am I going to be free of this "stingy" behavior of mine. I don't even swim a lot in the summer. I just hang out near the pool. Should I suck it up and just INVITE them already and call it a day. So what if they want to come back for some more fun, right? I shouldn't be such a "nasty" person when it comes to my Oasis, right? Ugh. I just can't seem to do it.

Mind you..summer isn't even here yet, and I'm already getting harassed about this pool.

Hah..what would be funny is if one of the church members read this thread and calls me....:D
 
Your pool = your rules.

Let me ask you this....would your invite this person to your house if you did not have a pool? Is this a person you would accept an invite to their house to have dinner? Would you invite this person to go out to dinner with?

It does not matter what this person does as a career/job. You should NOT be pressured by ANYONE to invite them over to YOUR home. Your home=your oasis to use and enjoy as you please.

The person that is putting the pressure on you is not being a good friend. They are trying to use YOUR pool for THEIR gain. They think they will gain some sort of status by making you invite their person over. If you do it once they will expect to do it again and again and again!! It is called "setting a precedence" in a court of law. Do NOT allow this person to even think about inviting anyone over. If/when they start this conversation again look them in the eye and say "NO". Don't say anything else. If they keep on trying to talk you into it look them in the eye again and say "NO". Nothing else. Just "NO". The next time, and there will be a next time, do the same thing! Keep doing it until they give up. It might take 3 to 5 times but after a while they will give up. Of course then they will talk about you making sure you can hear them. Just smile and move on!

:hug: and stay strong! Just because you have a pool does not mean your house is an open house to anyone else!!!

Kim:kim:
 
I agree with your for sure.
Nope... I won’t invite this person to my home if I didn’t have a pool
I would never go to this persons house for dinner
I would never go out as a family to any luncheon or dinner with this person.

She’s definitely using my pool for her gain. She wants to invite the church members over. I mean, I don’t even go to church even though I’m a Christian. So I don’t even know these people she wants to invite. I’ve been telling her no for the past one year almost. Ever since I got my pool, she’s been on my case. no means no. I just feel really bad after I had my last conversation with her cause she said that my behavior was rude. LOL...especially to a man of God (Pastor)... UGH

So yeah! I’ll keep saying nooooooo. I’m hoping she’ll stop asking me. Fingers crossed.
 
  • Haha
Reactions: Casey
It sounds like your relative/friend has some boundary issues. If it was me, I'd not invite this person to my home either since they care more about themselves than you.
If I did't know someone personally and had no desire to form a friendship, then there is no reason to have them over, pool or not. The issue of religion has zero to do with it. Pastors are just regular people like the rest of us.
 
  • Like
Reactions: splashpad
Teald024 said:
It sounds like your relative/friend has some boundary issues. If it was me, I'd not invite this person to my home either since they care more about themselves than you.
If I did't know someone personally and had no desire to form a friendship, then there is no reason to have them over, pool or not. The issue of religion has zero to do with it. Pastors are just regular people like the rest of us.
Click to expand...
You're absolutely right. I shouldn't feel bad at all. I don't know these people and don't care to know them. She is definitely trying to get me to form a bond with the church members all in the sake of a pool. ?‍♀️
 
³
Mendy48 said:
She’s definitely using my pool for her gain. She wants to invite the church members over. I mean, I don’t even go to church even though I’m a Christian. So I don’t even know these people she wants to invite. I’ve been telling her no for the past one year almost. Ever since I got my pool, she’s been on my case. no means no.
Click to expand...

Next time, tell her "here's a way you can invite the whole congregation if you want"...then hand her the name and number of your pool builder.
 
Last edited:
  • Haha
  • Like
Reactions: pooldv, Mendy48, splashpad and 1 other person
+1 what Kimkats said! I find it incredulous that anyone would do that...but then again, it doesn't surprise me in the least.
I am with the OP...I am very stingy with things that I have worked very hard for in my life...and I have no desire to "share" my pool with every Tom, Richard, and Harry out there. We are having our first pool party in a few weeks and am already dreading it...am I selfish? Probably a little bit...but that's OK with me!
 
  • Like
Reactions: Mendy48

Enjoying this content?

Support TFP with a donation.

Give Support
Wow, I'm glad I don't have those issues. We value our space and privacy. Though I know whenever I have a truck it seems like people that need couches moved come out of the woodwork. Don't feel guilty about anything, it's your work and life. I would have probably told him/her that all pool parties are nude at my house, no exceptions, and see how that goes over, just for kicks.
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Reactions: Mendy48 and Wobblerlorri
You must log in or register to reply here.
Thread Status
Hello , This thread has been inactive for over 60 days. New postings here are unlikely to be seen or responded to by other members. For better visibility, consider Starting A New Thread.
Top Bottom
Back
Jump to latest Follow Reply