How to get Spouse to Clean and Maintain the Pool

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Mendy48

Mendy48

Bronze Supporter
Apr 27, 2018
1,006
Midland, MI
I'm not sure if it's only me, but my hubby is COMPLETELY oblivious when it comes to our pool "Oasis". I literally do everything for our pool. I'm the "to-go" guru for our pool. He just sits and watches and enjoys the results of our Oasis. He's looking forward to cranking up the heat and going for a quick swim... or a long one...once I'm done balancing things out in our pool. I'm honestly annoyed at this. I would like to just not take care of my pool at all and have him swim in a swamp forest for a while to get him "interested" in taking care of Oasis. I'm tempted, but I have little ones and they'll be sooooo upset. Ugh.... Love him but darn....what a pain.
 
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I feel your pain! The ONLY thing mine has to do is brush the sides of the pool. I do the bottom (well my cleaner, Lil' Kim does for me), and maintain the chemicals down to being the only one to pick them up.

Well I guess he was getting lazy with the brushing............you know his ONLY job with the pool HE wanted............because I noticed some green on the sides..............sigh :roll: I called him over from where he was sitting........."honey have you brushed the pool today or any time recently?" Blank look on his face then.............."yummmmmmmmmmm it didn't need it"............"well what is this??" as I brush my hand along the side of the pool to make the algae cloud up!! You have NEVER seen a man jump so fast into the pool and start brushing! LOL Of course I had to so a SLAM to get it gone but has not forgotten to brush the side again!

So yeah I hear ya!!

Kim:kim:
 
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Before we got our pool, I will admit that I told the wife that pool care was her job since she wanted to pool. If she wanted it, then she had to take care of it, brush it, chemicals, net out the stuff. But I willingly and graciously accepted the responsibility since I wanted it clean, low cost, and I liked playing with the test kit. She would just dump in some powder and hope for the best .... and she HATES bugs!
There has got to be a way that a wife can get her husband do something off the honey-do-list:love:. You could always turn off the heater until he does his part.
 
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My bf and I have a deal.... I deal with the chemistry and cleaning of the pool and he deals with any mechanical issues when they arise. Probably not a fair deal (for me), but he simply does not have the attention to detail to handle the testing, logging, monitoring, cleaning, etc... the way I think it should be done. I'm kind of OCD, so it's probably best this way, but I do get a little resentful when I spend an hour getting the pool in perfect condition for use and he just saunters outside at the tail end and jumps in before I can even get a beer and a beach towel!
 
CarolineM said:
I am solely responsible for everything pool related. My husband sits and watches and still has no clue what to do. I love caring for my pool and take pride in it.
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I do as well... Love taking care of it to tell you the truth. However, when hubby starts asking stupid questions like "did you shock the pool before the kids got in it? I want it to be clean."...it pisses me off to no end. I just look at him and roll my eyes.

PoolGate said:
Mine does nothing at all. And I wouldn't want her to anyway. If I do it, I know what is going on and I know that it gets done. Pool care is only a task for the detail oriented.
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So true. (y)

Arizonarob said:
Ain’t that the truth! Even when I talk to her about what I’m doing, she has a look on her face like I’m speaking Swahili. :roll:
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My hubby looks at me and blatantly tells me to "Pleaseeeee stop talking". I throw a bunch of worms on him from the skimmer basket when he said that. Classic moment. :LOL:
 
Sometimes it's best to keep ownership of the pool chores. When I was away briefly last September, Mrs. Squirrel agreed to add a gallon of chlorine on Tuesday. I left detailed printed instructions, but I forgot Step Zero, Read the Label. She dumped in a gallon of MA instead.

In general, our division of labor is OK with both of us. I take care of the outdoor stuff like pool, BBQ, sprinklers and she handles the indoor stuff like laundry and vacuuming. I cook dinner, and she cleans the kitchen afterward. Turns out I'm a better cook than a cleaner, which is why we do it that way.
 
Rocket J Squirrel said:
Sometimes it's best to keep ownership of the pool chores. When I was away briefly last September, Mrs. Squirrel agreed to add a gallon of chlorine on Tuesday. I left detailed printed instructions, but I forgot Step Zero, Read the Label. She dumped in a gallon of MA instead.

In general, our division of labor is OK with both of us. I take care of the outdoor stuff like pool, BBQ, sprinklers and she handles the indoor stuff like laundry and vacuuming. I cook dinner, and she cleans the kitchen afterward. Turns out I'm a better cook than a cleaner, which is why we do it that way.
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Yeah! I guess (in hindsight) I really wouldn't give up my control of the pool even if I could. My husband is good at other things (yard work, fixing up stuff around the house, car maintenance, etc) and chewing loudly...LOL...
 
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I wanted the pool when we were house hunting so it because "my responsibility" to maintain it. Before we were even in escrow I was reading TFP pages. I bought the test kit, I established the cleaning routine/process, I deal with the purchasing of chemicals, etc. But very similar to DiverGirl1972 - he deals with the mechanics (he's an engineer.. that's his jam. I've got a science/chemistry background... so maintenance is in my wheelhouse). He'll watch the filter pressure levels and backwash/clean and he's the one who's been tinkering with the pump schedule. But along the lines of cleaning and chemicals - he's good to follow simple instructions ("Go put in two bottles of chlorine please").

I agree that I like it this way. When he's even mentioned chlorine and pH levels - he's baseline is WAAAY off.
Plus he does all the yard/lawn work. I haven't picked up a weed-eater or mowed the lawn in almost 15 years!
 
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I'm in the same boat as many of you. Mrs. B does not want to "deal with" the chlorine, filters, water levels, etc. I do 100% of the pool maintenance while she gets to jump in the pool with our 3 grandkids while laughing and playing and soaking up the sun on her huge pool float. The only time she does anything pool water related is one week of the year while I'm volunteering for church camp. I leave her 7 bottles of LC that have each day labeled on them. She dumps them in WHILE THE PUMP IS ON and cannot swim until at least 30 minutes after. That's it. Her job in the summer is to feed our four hens, give them plenty of fresh water and not let our pit-bulls near them.

And yes, I would not want it any other way. I'm waaaaay more detail oriented than she is and always will be so.
 
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Mendy - Thanks for the laughs about your interactions!

I am so happy to provide a clean swimming environment for my wife (and kids/dogs). She does more work than me inside the house and with the kid's school work, etc. (the stereotypically female tasks) though she is also home more.

There is also the factor that men (and women I believe) will purposely feign ignorance to avoid tasks they would rather not perform.
 
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