First day of summer & random kids already showing up

[glitter&guns]

Not that ya'll can do anything about it, but I just wanted to complain. New to me house & as near as I can figure I am the first owner with kids in many many years. Over the weekend I laid 2 pallets of sod and in all that joy I had kids I don't know ringing the doorbell. I chased one 10 year old off and she came back half hour later not only in her swim suit, but with her 6 year old niece in tow. This morning my doorbell rang today at 9am to a kid in a bathing suit with the line "my mom said I can come over and swim". NONE of these kids have ever been to swim at my house. These are not kids that we are friends with. I wouldn't show up at any of their homes and ask their parents for keys to their boat/car/house - why is my pool assumed to be public property. Ugh.

I know, preaching to the choir, but ugh! I guess I am now officially "that mean old bat with a swimming pool"!

 

[bigfunky]

I am surprised people send their kids over to your house and they don't even know you...That hasn't happened to me yet!

 

[jblizzle]

Luckily we have no nearby neighbors to run into that problem.

It is quite ridiculous that the parents think this is acceptable ... and clearly have not taught their children to not have a sense of entitlement.

 

[glitter&guns]

I think the real crux of the problem is that I moved to a place that is still very "small town" in feel even though it is no longer a small town. I bought in an established subdivision which seems to make it a bit worse. There is still the idea floating around that everyone knows everyone else. I lived in a northern city for years, and hardly spoke to my neighbors other than a polite "hi" in the driveway. I wouldn't dream of letting my kids go to a house where I didn't know the family, and won't let mine walk around the neighborhood. I am about the only one! lol!

 

[JohnT]

A previous thread on the subject for more info

 

[Butterfly]

Holy Cow

Sounds like you may have a hard time training those folks

Sure hope you have some serious locking gates...and a tall un-climbable fence!

 

[Isaac-1]

Each situation is different, you say you are new to the house, do you know if the previous owner allowed neighborhood kids to use the pool? Are their other pools in the neighborhood? You may want to embrace this small town get to know your neighbors feel, and likely everyone does know a lot about everyone but you (well maybe not everyone, but more people than you would think). Part of this sense of community may include letting some of the neighborhood kids swim in your pool on occasion, but if you decide to allow it then it should be under your terms (their parents must be there, by invitation, etc.). As such action is the way you may get invited to go boating with them, etc. It is a narrow line to walk, and it may simply be easier to say the pool is for your family only, but it is something to think about.

 

[glitter&guns]

Each situation is different, you say you are new to the house, do you know if the previous owner allowed neighborhood kids to use the pool? Are their other pools in the neighborhood? You may want to embrace this small town get to know your neighbors feel, and likely everyone does know a lot about everyone but you (well maybe not everyone, but more people than you would think). Part of this sense of community may include letting some of the neighborhood kids swim in your pool on occasion, but if you decide to allow it then it should be under your terms (their parents must be there, by invitation, etc.). As such action is the way you may get invited to go boating with them, etc. It is a narrow line to walk, and it may simply be easier to say the pool is for your family only, but it is something to think about.

You are right that each situation is different. I grew up in a small town but it is taking me a bit of time to transition back to being OK with people asking/caring about so much of my personal life. And to the pool - From what I understand everyone hated the last owners of the house - apparently think of the worst neighbors you can get and that is who lived here (well, no one was selling drugs out of the house, but dogs running loose, screaming fights in the front yard, non custodial kids shooting neighbors pets w bb guns when they were in town). I was surprised because it really is a nice area - not pretentious, but nice. The owner before that was a single man who was gone most of the time and no one even knows what his job was because he kept to himself so much. That gets us about 9 years back - I am not sure what the deal was before that. So there is no recent history of neighborhood pool use. There are almost no pools in this town and only 2 others in my neighborhood (both belonging to adult only households). No public pools, no swim clubs, the 'country club' is just a golf course and only 2 neighborhoods in town have a sub division pool. I am in a lake town, though, so almost all of the neighbors have very nice boats.

I am on the list for a pool resurface and some upgrades. Once all that is done (and I am comfy that I understand the chemistry pretty well), I figure we will invite over some of the neighbors for a swim. I really don't mind having them over for a party, but don't see setting myself up to be the baby sitter house for the summer. Heck, I am going to let my 13 year old have her birthday party here later this summer, and will be hiring a life guard for the event. I imagine all the 13/14 year olds can swim well enough, but I don't want to be the only set of eyes on on the group!

 

[bigcow94]

we have to little kids (2 & 3mos) that get in the pool with us. our neighborhood has kids all over the place and we've never had any of them show up at our door looking to swim. The neighbors on either side of us have kids ranging from 6-16 and at first it wasn't even an option for them to use our pool when we first moved in. fast forward a few years and we have gotten to know their parents quite well and we felt that it was okay for them to use the pool as long as THEIR parents would come over and supervise as well. simple rule if you're parents aren't around then you're not swimming. we did also add a umbrella policy on our insurance because we can't keep eyes on our pool 24 hours a day.