Not many people know this but Santa lays off all the Elves on January 1st. Being pretty good at assembly, the little buggers make there way down here for a few months and manufacture test kits.
They drink quite a bit and fight like **** but, as long as we don't start before 10:30AM, I get decent work out of them. They're kind of a surly bunch so don't believe that happy TV image you see. God forbid that you're 15minutes late with the checks on payday, too.
Since they're illegals, I don't have to pay them too much and they all sleep out in the barn. We don't go out there after dark......the Sherrif was out once about two years ago but we all pretended we were asleep. I noticed two of them missing next day but none of them voluntereed any info so......you know....don't ask, don't tell.
Usually around August 1st, they pack up and head North. Not all at once, for some reason, but they're all gone within a week or so. The barn is an absolute disaster. Liquor bottles everywhere and we even found a pistol last year.
The idea of giving a factory tour some day would probably land us all in jail. If those rascals weren't so dextrous with those tiny little hands (didya' ever notice how all the bottles are filled almost perfectly equal?), I think I'd move the operation where they couldn't find us and hire real people. They'd probably get Santa involved and hunt me down like a dog, tho....I think I'm stuck with 'em forever!